Our lil hypnobaby arrived!! Despite all the negative stories, words, and feelings people tried to throw towards birth my way. I let all of those stories bounce off of me with my "bubble of peace". But reallllyyyyyyy.... I don't know why pregnant woman complain when we should be celebrating how amazing and beautiful our bodies are! Pregnancy and birth are simply ammmmmmmaaazzingg.....really words can NOT describe. I still can't believe how powerful and wonderful the uterus is! "There is no other organ quite like the uterus. If men had such an organ they would brag about it. So should we"- Ina May Gaskin
I too questioned if hypnobirthing was going to work. I had my doubts but always worked towards thinking positive vibes about my birthing day. After all my 1st birth, Georgie's birth, had been beautiful ...just long, hard work. In hypnobirth you have daily tracks to listen to that get your mind thinking positive towards birth. There is also lots of deeping your consciousness and finding relaxation. These tracks you are suppose to stay awake for. Yep there were months and months of listening and falling asleep through the tracks everyday. But they say even if you fall asleep your subconscious mind will absorb and it is true!!
My birthing time all started with a 2 mile walk (at 40weeks and 4days). Pretty sure we tried everything before that to get baby to started from pineapple, eggplant, love, and yes castor oil. There were even 3 nights in a row with constant birthing waves! But I awoke to nothing new happening. Yep, I was convinced baby was just was not ready. At the 1 mile mark I asked my mom what it felt like when her water broke was it trickling or was it like in the movies when all hell breaks loose? Well five seconds after asking this Im thinking I just peed my pants. I take a squat in the ditch get up, move on with my walk, and realize these warm gushes keep on flowing out of me. Ohh!! This is what it feels like when your water breaks! Psst, nothing like the movies. Just felt like I was peeing a little bit with every few steps. We finished the last of our 2nd mile and I got home, took a shower, laid down, and started listening to my birthday affirmations track. My waves have not even started at this point but I wanted to get some rest in before it was time. Rest is key the say for the beginning of your birthing time. Well but of course I was too excited for sleep and after one or two hours of waiting I felt some waves starting to develop. I had just found out before I laid down that our midwife had been home sick with the flu. I was a lil sad she wouldn't be there for our birth but I didn't let that affect me since I knew to trust my own body. Plus she said the doctor that delivered Georgie would be the one on call and he advocated for natural birth. I laid on the bed with lots of going back-and-forth to the restroom and drinking lots of water to keep my amniotic fluids up.
Maybe this was when my active labor started? Pressure waves starred to build up and I started to wonder again if my hypnotherapy was going to work. Negative thoughts were running through my mind at this point. I was getting afraid I wouldn't be able to make it. I put on my fear clearing track and told myself positive vibes!! And all the while doing horse lips during the waves and tell myself to relax and open. I thought the bath tub would be nice since it calmed me some much with my first birth. I laid in the tub for what felt like 5mins..it just wasn't working out for me. So back in bed I laid to try to get some sleep. Brice came in about that time, 2 AM and measured the time in between my pressure waves it ranged from 5 to 7 minutes. Well, crap. Waves still weren't close or strong enough for me to go to Salina. With my first birth we had went when my waves were 4mins apart and I ended up being at the hospital for over 15hrs. So I walked back into the bathroom feeling like I was going to puke!
Ok so puke, I guess this is a BIG sign that you are going through transformation (transition). I found that out after Lollie's birth. Yep did NOT even know that I was in transformation (transition) time! Hypnobirth works! I remember sitting there chewing my nails and thinking..well I must not be that far along since I'm over here chewing at my nubs. Chewing on my nails has always got me over my nausea for some reason. Ask my family...everything makes me nauseous!! Every. Thing. Finally I asked Brice when he thought we should leave. After he called the hospital they told us to come right away. I guess they thought I should have been coming when my water broke? Lol but I knew that your birthing could last hrs after your water breaking so I wanted to spend most of the time birthing at home. I knew for sure we were probably leaving for the hospital wayyy too early! My pressure waves were no where strong enough. I would be at the hospital for a long time and with the request of pain meds at the drop of a hat. I was a little worried I wouldn't be able to make the natural birth I wanted. With these thoughts I put back on my fear clearing track and focused on the positive. I was made for this. My body will open!
Heading to Salina...we called mom to come sleep over with our daughter and as we waited for her arrival I was standing outside thinking of how peaceful it was with the warm and cool breezes, the sound of bugs, and the moonlight. I could have had my baby right there!! Just then a strong wave hit and I knew we should probably head that way. Brice called mom and let her know the door was unlocked and we start heading towards Salina. My waves were pretty powerful but I knew they weren't strong enough yet that the power get even stronger and I worried and worried about how strong they might get at the hospital. I wouldn't call them painful just very very powerful. Some of my waves were one right on top of the another. Which I was finding strange. Throughout the car ride when a wave would come with it I would do horse lips and move my legs back-and-forth also focusing in on going deeper into it up hypnosis which would allow me to find muscles in my body that were tense. Every time I looked for tense muscles by butt cheeks would be all tighten up so I told myself relax then I repeated to myself "open soften and release" I just kept telling my body Yes! Yes! Yes! Open, open, and open. We pulled up to Salina hospital Brice parked in the parking garage we walk across over to the hospital into the lobby along the way I had at least three waves. As Brice was checking us in I guess a security guy came up to me during a wave and asked "can I help you ma'am" Haha!!! Classic. I had my headphones in with my tracks playing. No idea someone came up to me. Umm sir, I'm trying to have a baby. I looked up and they were trying to get me a wheelchair. I said no I can't sit right now and another wave hit. I leaned over rocking back and forth, horse lips, open open, soften, release. After the wave I said ok, sat in the wheelchair, and the nurse quickly got me up to the 6th floor. The birthing floor. I walked into the room and a nurse asked me to lay down on the bed so she could monitor the baby and the pressure waves I said no I cannot lay down right now and another wave hit I leaned over the bed rocking back-and-forth back-and-forth, horse lips, open open, soften, release. With the wave over I went to the bathroom to have a poop(I thought) once again a powerful wave hit. I just let my head hang and rocked my body back and forth. Horse lips, open , open, yes, yes, soften, release! This was a pushing wave! The nurses were a bit nervous when I told them this. They wanted me off the toilet lol. I came back into the birthing room and had them raise up the bed so I could kneel on it backwards on all fours. As they we're raising it for me another pressure wave hit and I felt baby drop into the birth canal! This is it!! YES! The nurses were busy trying to get a IV in me since I tested posted for StepB. But all I could think is it's too late for this IV! Baby is here! Just then another pressure wave and a ring of fire! A beautiful ring of fire!! You won't know until you feel it yourself but it's a very exciting feeling. Indescribable, beautiful, sublime. I turned over since that felt more relaxing to push baby out. The urge to push had taken over me and it felt good. Seriously pushing is the best feeling in the world!! I remember telling myself to slooooowwww down. I wanted to give my body time to stretch ...but my body wouldn't stop! I would say after 3 waves baby was out. Perineum intact, no tears, no stitches! My only thing I would have change is I would have loved to catch lil Lollie! But in the moment I was very focused and just in the zone. Everything happened so quickly that I didn't even know she was here. Miss Lollie Mae arrived joyfully and peacefully at 5:40am less then 40mins of setting foot into the hospital. She beat our photographer and she beat our doctor in arriving! Oh and I still had my dress on that I arrived in. :P
Below are some beautiful moments following Lollie's birth captured by T.Marie Photography
Kansas Photographer, and teacher inspired by drug free birth, imperfections, giggles, thrift shop treasures, & acts of randomness